How to Include Family When Eloping
Invite them!
Didn’t know you could do that? You CAN! Just because you’re elopenig doesn’t mean you can’t have any guests. Elopements are whatever you want them to be and they give you the chance to only invite those that are most important to you. It’s a good opportunity to really think through who you both can’t imagine having your day without. PRO TIP: Even if you have a small guest list, it may be worth having a planner or day of coordinator so the wedding day tasks don’t burden your family. I’ve seen many times the DIY approach, even with a very small amount of guests, overwhelm the family members who are tasked with a job the day of. It’s typically a big day for them too and they don’t want to be emotionally distracted.
Have them send letters to you in advance and read them on your elopement day.
This is a really easy way to include your family and you can read the letters at any point on your day. There is also something about putting pen to paper that really allows people to communicate their deep feelings. Not to mention, what a sweet keepsake? Another tangible memory you get to keep for many years after your wedding day.
Have them record a video you can watch on your elopement day.
Similarly to the letters, this is an easy way to involve family and enjoy at any time and any location on your wedding day. They can even make that family slideshow with all your cute baby photos and awkward teen year pics! You just simply download it to your phone or laptop. And again, a great keepsake. Alternatively you can grab a video of the ceremony and text it to them right afterwards!
Invite them to attend virtually.
With technology these days it’s so easy to have family attend virtually. There are even companies like LoveStream or Wedfuly that provide a streaming service and can really go above and beyond to ensure you have great video quality and make it stress free for you. Of course a phone and a tripod will do the trick too! (I can bring the tripod!) The biggest caveat is just making sure you’ll have cell service wherever your ceremony location is.
Party with family before or after.
With elopements you can slice your day any way you want. Have a private ceremony and portrait time in the morning then meet up with family to party and have dinner afterwards. Have a relaxed brunch in the morning with guests and then head off for alone time for the rest of the day. Or plan a separate celebratory day post wedding. I’ve even heard of having a party prior to the wedding day to celebrate the engaged couple as a way to send them forth into marriage with love and support.
I know our close family and friends are always honored to be a part of your wedding day but here are some things to consider if you are including guests:
Will it effect the way you truly want to celebrate?
Will it negatively impact your budget?
Are there are tense family dynamics?
Will guests have to spend their own money to travel/buy clothes etc.?
Will guests have to take time off from work?
Will wedding day tasks and arrangements fall on their shoulders causing them to be stressed?
Will you have much time to spend with them?
Is there is a guest limit for the public location you want to use for your ceremony? (Many parks and public lands have restrictions for guest count.)